Wednesday, December 29, 2010

More to Come:

Okay, so I've neglected my blog for a few days - but I can ensure you that there is much more to come!

I have much to discuss, much to rant about, and plenty of nonsensical blathering.

Until then, I love you all! :-D

Friday, December 24, 2010

We All Need A Little Christmas...

As the song says, we all need a little Christmas... right?

I suppose.

As this holiday of wonder and merriment and glee (Glee!) and all of those other fluffy and delightful adjectives quickly approaches (tomorrow), I've started to ponder. What am I pondering, you ask? I'm pondering *thunder and lightning* how to take over the world!

No, seriously; what does Christmas mean to you? If you read this, post your answer in a comment below this post. But since I've asked I can only do the kindest of favors and share with you how Christmas has evolved in my life and what it has, unfortunately in some instances, grown to mean.

Well...

When I was a wee little one, Christmas was "the most wonderful time of the year" and was a day that I anticipated all year long. Not for the presents, not for the cookies and deserts, but for the decorations. I loved decorating my house and Christmas tree(s), my Granny's tree, and then if I was lucky, my Grandma's tree! Every year I would insist on my parent's driving me around so I could see all of the lights around town. My Grandpa and I would drive to Garden Ridge and other stores and places to look at decorations to add to our conglomeration - it was a passion that I know that I acquired from him (RIP Grandpa).

This continued until I was in 4th grade - when I woke up Christmas morning and new something was wrong. My dad was acting strange and my mom was gone - and she never left before our "family pictures" and before I opened my presents, but she claimed that she had to go clean her parent's house - which even I could see through - as usual. The events to follow are memories that I think would be best to keep from you though I would share in a one-on-one situation. But as the day ended, I was sitting in my room at my Granny's alone, afraid, and crying. My mom and dad had a fight, they split up, and would never be back together again. As sad, scared, and confused as I was - there was still hope. I knew that I wouldn't have to endure the things that I had endured growing up anymore - but I knew there was other hell(s) to ensue. Oh, now that's an understatement.

After this day, my view of Christmas (aside from the religious/Christian aspect of Christmas) began to change. It slowly progressed from a magical day to just another day. A day to remember the end to such a disaster. And end to something that I believed was my fault. It was a day that I wanted to forget - and for a few years, a day that I would neglect and attempt to hide from.

That went on for several years until I moved back to Starke and began making friends and attending FBC. Singing in the choir, making healthy, stable friends, etc. helped me to regain what I thought I had long lost.

Now when Christmas comes around, in some attempt to remember what I felt when I was a child, I put up my Christmas Tree(s), decorate my house/apartment, and listen to the music that made me smile those (not-so-long) years ago. I burn the wonderful candles, cook the scrumptious goodies, and go look at all of the lights - and forge some haphazard smile.

Yet here I sit: alone, surrounded by Christmas lights, presents, and candles... wondering what the next year will bring. Have I been successful this year? Have I used my time wisely? Why do I feel stuck? What's missing? What did I fail to do? What can I change about next year? Is Christmas a time to remember the end of the year is near - and bring it all to a close? Or should I save that for New Year's Eve?

That's all for now, my loves.

*hugs*

Kris

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Ugh.

Oh geez.

So I've worked two 12-hour days in a row. I'm sorry for not blogging. :-(
One 12-hr day left, and then I can blog freely! Yay!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The Marrow of Life: "Carpe-ing" the "Diem"

The marrow of life...

I went into the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life...to put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.
Henry David Thoreau

It seems so easy to get caught up in the hell that goes on in and around us, neglecting to enjoy the moments in life that should make it all worth living and to let life pass by without experiencing that moment when one realizes the purpose and meaning of this brief span of existence. I suppose it it first necessary for one to decide which is more important: the destination or the journey.

The destination:
Everyone in life has a belief of some sort - even if they deny a "higher power" - a belief is still maintained. For some the destination of life is a heavenly afterlife whilst for others it's simply death. No matter what the belief, we all die. No matter how good or bad, how poor or rich, how successful or unsuccessful a person - that person still dies. Now, I'm not advocating living a life of mediocrity of any sort, but I do have a point. There are certain things in life that isn't worth the stress that we submit ourself to endure - most of which we worry about and never even comes to past. Why worry and stress over things that will simply pass by and soon be a distant memory. Sure, at the time it can be hard to endure, but put into perspective isn't worth it.

The journey:
The journey is life. It's the good times and the bad; the fortunes and the flaws; the love and the hate - it's our purpose. The journey should be our reason for living. If we live solely for what is to come we miss what we already have. It's important to set goals, yes. But the key to doing so is to be able to see what you want to obtain or what is to come and use what you have now to grasp it and handle it accordingly - being sure to be aware of the "here and now". If you neglect the "now", you are sure to miss out. If you neglect the future, you will have no direction. A healthy conglomeration of both is ideal: enjoy your life, your journey, and what you have while planning for what is to come.

Remember, it's not all about how much you accomplish, but about how hard you work and how true you are to what you want that matters. Live life with your heart, your soul, your self.

Okay, enough of that ranting bullshit for tonight, I suppose. I call it bullshit in light of how serious it truly is - I know. I believe everything that I've stated and this serves solely as an outlet for me to vent. What would be the fun in keeping all of my thoughts to myself. After all, I type all of this out for me, not for all of you to read. :-) Though I do love you all, dearly!

You know, lately life has decided to throw at me a number of hella-crazy trials that have sent me into a frenzy; a mental break-down of sorts!

It's nearly one in the morning. I'll wake up tomorrow before slaving away at work to update everyone on these events. I need to rant, you obviously want to read: it works for us both, I suppose.

I love you all dearly!

Kris

*disclaimer* I've read the blog and have seen several grammatical/spelling/syntax errors but am too lazy to fix them. Sorry, loves.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

So, what's up with all of this DADT talk?

So, what's up with all of this DADT talk going on?

In case you have yet to be informed, DADT was repealed by both the House and the Senate and has been sent to the Office of the President to be signed. I think that it's quite obvious that even though Don't Ask, Don't Tell has been repealed, it will remain an "unspoken rule" for quite some time. I'm very excited, however, about the doors that are now being opened for the homosexual community because of this monumental breakthrough. I am very pleased with this and am excited to see what the future holds for our civil rights. In lieu of all of this excitement, bigots around the country are lighting their torches and sharpening their pitchforks, I can assure you. The light may be visible, but is still quite a ways away.

So there has been a quote that I've stumbled upon lately that keeps coming to memory:
"Only a man who has felt ultimate despair is capable of feeling ultimate bliss"

Lately, it seems as if the world will never brighten and that tomorrow will be just as shitty as today. It seems as if the forces of the universe have decided that my life will be a metaphor of eternal damnation - and as "doom-n-gloom" as it may sound - it is true. In every storm, however, is hope. This quote has had quite the impact following recent "unfortunate" events in my crazy life - and I've been able to realize that everything that I'm going through is shaping me for the next trial and one day I will be able to know that I'm a strong, strong-willed, well built, and sound person because of everything that I've been through and because of such pain that I've endured, I will be able to understand the truth in the happiness that I will one day acquire.

"Happiness" - a word that has taken on so many different meanings in life. I have ultimately decided that it is now time for my own "happiness". Time to life for Kris, and for Kris alone. Not to become selfish and to be ignorant but to work at establishing my own life. I have to learn to love from a distance, to make decisions based on my needs and wants, and to disconnect in order to grow and establish what I will one day accomplish. I have goals and dreams and unless I start pursuing them, I will never succeed... So what is happiness? Is it being content with what you have? Is happiness having everything you want? Is there any conglomerate at the two that accurately defines "happiness"? Can it even be truly obtained?

Obviously I've been doing far too much thinking as of late. Dammit to hayull.

Well - for tonight I will be off to bed. I know my rant is fairly incoherent tonight - which I will attribute to the clock notifying me that it is indeed post 2am. I feel as if this is sufficient enough for the moment. There shall be more (more concise, coherent) blogging tomorrow in which I shall discuss the most risqué of topics, or so I hope. Until tomorrow, my loves:

Kris

Bye Bye Blackbird...

Ahoy, Ahoy!

Ah, yes. Did you know that this is the greeting that Alexander G. Bell first thought appropriate when one answers the phone? Ridiculous.

Random.

Anyways - so I've returned. Yes, my fellow creeper(s), for a more permanent stay this time! I promise!

So, I've decided to finish the blog project that I started oh-so-long ago! It's about damn time, I know. (Yes, I'm talking to you Mr. Guess)

*DRUM-ROLL PLEASE*

I was accepted for admission to NEW YORK UNIVERSITY for FALL 2011!!! I'm waiting on my scholarship that I have slaved over (a massive compilation of writing) and should know before the Spring semester if I will be receiving this amazing award. If not, then I shan't be enrolling at NYU.

So here are my options: Receive the scholarship and transfer in August (the best option, in my opinion) or move to Northern California (Crescent City) in April when my lease is up here in Gainesville. Either option is amazing and will provide for a chance to grow and learn like never before - though it is my dream to live and school in New York City! OMG! (gay-moment, I know.)

Oh, I no longer work at Tropical (Hell) Smoothie but an a Sales Associate at Spencer's Gifts (I know, right?) and am an Assistant Manager at The Body Shop (check it out, ya'll. It's boss fa sho!)

I passed all of my courses this past semester with flying colors (A+, A+, A, A, B+) and am so excited to see what next semester holds for me and my future.

This semester has given me the opportunity to make so many new friends! I didn't think I'd become "social", but you know me - I'm a "talker" so I've made many friends anew. Pwn'd. Ah, how I've loved it. I can't believe I've actually been living on my own and supporting myself. How freaking scary!

Oh, so tonight at the mall there was some sort of bomb threat and we all had to evacuate and apparently there was some sort of fire that was in relation to the bomb threat - it was quite the interesting series of events - but the male firefighters were my favorite spectacle of the evening! :-)

Okay, so my next blogs will be much more meaningful than this mindless banter, but I figured that I would cease the moment and update my love(s) on my life. But for now, I've decided to continue my "Daily" confession project that I started some time ago. Here's what I've already accomplished and what I've yet to do:

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend


Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet


Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

So, in lieu of all of this:

Day 10:

Dear Auntie,

Oh goodness. So how is it that we are so close yet only talk like eight times a year. What the hell is wrong with us? We need communication. How are we supposed to stay in the "loop" if we don't keep up the talking, bitch! I love you - and could very well soon live with you - we should chit-chat a bit more, don'tcha think? I thunk'd so too. Call me, gurl.

Love you, Auntie!

Kristofer

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Chillin in the gym... A little tipsy... Aychin scary movie 4 with brandi and erica. Oh geez

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Saturday, November 27, 2010

2010: A Reflection

Hey girl, hey! I know it's been forever since I've written anything here - but lately I've been dying to write a new blog. I want to continue to keep it updated; I need all of the practice with writing that I can receive. So, with no further ado - 2010: A Reflection.


With 2011 on the nigh on the horizon, it only seems fitting to reflect over the events of the last year...

This past year has been one of many trials, losses, and victories. I celebrated the birth of 2010 at a New Year's Eve party surrounded by people that I - at the time - held dear to me; a group of people whom I seemed to fit in with, who loved me, who wanted me. At the "exeunt" of this year, I no longer associate with many of them. Friends who found out that I was something that they perceived to be vile, wrong, and unforgivable.

The day that my sexuality was discovered by the masses was a day of very mixed emotions. I wanted to deny who I was again simply to keep those people in my life - to abstain from their judgments, their hurtful words, their shameful looks - and to keep life as it was. Conversely it was a moment of liberation. Following that time in my life, I've been able to move out of my house, get an apartment, and sustain myself; all the while being able to be who I am - to be "Chris" (Or Kris™ - as you will see my name written most.)

Where much has been lost - much has been gained. New friends that I would never seek to replace, new experiences that I will never regret, and a new look on life that will take me far.

I've also learned a lot about myself. Things I don't like - things that completely disgust me about myself. Flipside: I've learned things about myself that I love - things that I'm proud of - and I know that with a little bit of effort I will be successful in everything that I attempt. If I could only stop slacking off. (No Bueno)









Kris™: End of 2010

Chris: Beginning of 2010



Things I want to accomplish in 2011:
  1. Get my own car.
  2. Move to a 4+ year University
  3. Become financially secure (savings, etc.)
  4. Lose weight (70 lbs)
  5. Visit California (again)
  6. New York City ('nuff said)
  7. Have something published
  8. Raise my GPA
  9. Work at Starbucks (I just do!)
  10. Develop a new style

Monday, August 23, 2010

I am a "dork fish"...

Well hello, stranger. Come here often?

Ah, the life of a college student. The hustle and bustle of frantic freshmen attempting to find a parking spot, knowing nothing of the "overflow" parking that is truly much easier to park in (rather than dealing with all of the bull-shit of the other parking-lots around campus); the "back-to-school" hang-overs from the mad parties around the 'Ville last night. It's a life you grow to love, that's for certain.

I must say that I love my classes (the two that I attended today) so far. My Art History class is going to kick my ass, I know, but I love Professor Lambert; she is one hell of a lady, and her idiosyncratic ways of teaching make it all the better. Surprisingly, I really enjoy my algebra class - as much as I do not appreciate the subject. Prof. Trefry seems slightly ditsy, though I'm hoping it was just because of the confusion that is expected with the first day. Once class began, she didn't seem so disheveled.

Oh, so my random "ear-gasm" for today comes from Ludo, and here it is for your viewing pleasure:



Well, I'm off to work on my math homework for a while. Till next time, be kind to yourself and others!

This above all: to thine own self be true.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.

"I'm more of a man than you'll ever be, and more of a women than you'll ever get." -Rent




So I've spent the majority of my day jamming out to this song by Beyonce. The reason why is still unknown to me but I freaking love it! Sorry - random, I know. I will be blogging more soon because there is so much more I have to update you on! My life is changing like crazy with every passing day!

Love you all! Keep checking in with me!

<3
Chris

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Always Reaching for that Rising Star...




Shadows
By Chris Davis
December 2009

I walk along betwixt the trees
The moonlight shinning down
Through the branches
Through the thickets
Casting shadows all around
Shadows that haunt
Shadows that follow
Shadows that call my name
This must be someone’s sick and twisted
“Schadenfreude” type game
They call at me and remind me
Remind me of the things of old
And those that will never be
They taunt me
They tease me
And tell me of what could
What should
And what shouldn’t
And what shouldn’t... is me

I believe in...

I believe in…

I believe in art.

I believe in love.

I believe in kissing.

I believe in miracles.

I believe that tomorrow is another day.

I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner.

I believe that if you want your life to be a magnificent story that you begin by realizing that you are the author and not the publisher. You have the right to make choices and live your life how you wish, but ultimately you are not the finisher of your story. Everyday you have the opportunity to write a new page, clean and blemish free to strive for your absolute potential.

I believe that some people aren’t meant to be in our lives forever. Maybe, just maybe, these people around us are simply passing through, bringing us something that we could not otherwise obtain: a gift, a blessing, or maybe just a lesson that we needed to learn. Some come and stay for a season, but even the short-lived can make the longest-lasting impressions.

I believe that you can’t live to please, and you sure can’t be perfect. You can’t let words define your love, you can’t allow what someone says hold you back from your life and from your love; you have to know that you have a purpose, you have worth, and you are a creation like no other ever created.

Dearest, darlingest Mumsie and Popsicle...

Consider this my disclaimer: I will not be held responsible for any medical attention necessary (this includes counseling and psychotherapy) to remove the potentially mind-imploding mental images that this may cause to occur.

Around the country there are old, horny, erectile-dysfunction laden teachers pissed about the latest change in their healthcare policies which no longer cover the “wonder pill”, Viagra, because it is not a pill that is needed to essentially “sustain life” and is considered a “pleasure medication”.

Are you freaking kidding me? No, this doesn’t add to the “creeper-pedophilic” stereotype given to old, creepy teachers at all! C’mon, healthcare companies, these poor teachers are pissed because of you! It’s not their fault that they can’t hold an erection long enough to bust a nut in bed! Oh shit, this is priceless.

Oh, congratulations California for the overturning of Proposition 8 – which removed the right of homosexual couples to marry in the state of California! I’m sure this won’t stand for long before it is re-established, but this is definitely a step in the right direction! I know that one day I will want to marry the love of my life even if that is a man. Sure, marriage sure as hell isn’t the sacred act and display of love that it used to be, but it would be nice to know that I could if I wanted to do so. Maybe the actions in California will lead to some revolution and revelation nation-wide and a respectable right will be given to the homosexual community. Of course, the typical gay “scene” totally negates anything that may be appealing about the homosexual community (to “breeders”, a.k.a. heterosexuals) and ruins any chances of a widespread acceptance – not to mention the shallow-minded bigots that think that they are without fault.

Almost forgot: Spring Awakening is coming to Gainesville! I am so freaking excited! It’s going to be amazing – and I’m so pissed that I forgot about the Producers (what with my trip to California and all) and missed it! What’s up with that? Ugh! I’ve seen the Gene Wilder version of the movie “The Producers” and loved it, but would absolutely die at the chance to be able to see it via live performance.

In other news, Step Up 3 3D was phenomenal. An orgasm for all of the senses – the rhythm, dancing, and not to mention the shirtless men – it was by far the best of the three. I would recommend seeing this movie even if you don’t see it in 3D, it is well worth the time and money.

Day 10:

Dear Chad,

Oh, where to begin? The seemingly most cliché place would be at the beginning I suppose, so why not?

Well, whenever I first found out that we were on the same “team” I was more than excited even though I was still locked away safely in the comfort of my closet – it was comforting and exciting to know that I had a cousin – family – that I could relate to and potentially be able to discuss things with and talk to about so many different feelings and thoughts that were wreaking havoc on my poor mind.

Eventually I slowly began bursting from the confines of said closet and emerging into a world of bigotry, prejudice, and uncertainty – confusion. Sure, I had friends to lean on, though a limited few could I trust to support me and help keep the closet door only partially open! Finally came the time to reveal this long kept secret, although Facebook wasn’t the most tactful way of doing so, I still was able to tell you that I too was gay – hoping that this would form some sort of relationship that had before never existed. I wanted to be able to talk to you and get to know you (and your adorable boyfriend) more and hopefully have someone that I could trust, etc. Not that I don’t trust amazing friends like Sarah or Megan – but it would be nice to have family to talk to – although I have the incredible Jane to talk to… I love her like crazy!

Thanks for everything, I suppose.

Chris.

Well, that's all for tonight, folks.

Be kind to yourself and others.
This above all: To thine own self be true.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

A chair is still a chair...

Laughter (n): When a smile has an orgasm


*Le Sigh*

Why do I love the idea of "love" so fucking much? Why do I insist on thinking that I will find true love at such an early age in life, neglecting to really enjoy my youth? It's very abusive to ones mind and soul - and doesn't really allow for one to enjoy much. It creates a false sense of ineptness (if that's a word) and insufficiency - not a great feeling, especially when one suffers with low self-esteem already! Damn it. Why do I want "love" - why now? I don't need it now and thus shouldn't want it now, but damn it, I couldn't want it more! Why? Because for some short period of time I had it - but that was ripped away from me - stupid bitch. But I'm definitely not getting into that conversation any time soon.

Well - today was good none the less. I got to hang out with my bestie, Sarah! She's the greatest. Geez, I love her. If I were straight... hell, shouldn't even go there because that's not happening any time soon (ever!) Now I'm just chilling with the roomie, Megan, at Starbucks and drinking a Passion Tea Lemonade. I love her too, Megan, she's amazing!

I'm not going to write a letter at the moment because I'm still working on it - it's a tough one for me to write and get's a little personal. So until next time, friends, be kind to yourself and others.

This above all: to thine own self be true!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Never Underestimate...

Never underestimate the pain of a person because the truth is that everyone is struggling. Some people hide it better than others.


So, I'm back and officially living the the G-ville. (Gainesville, for all of you non-Floridians or non-locals that don't know what "G-ville" refers to.)

I couldn't love it more here. I have an amazing room mate (Megan) whom I love dearly. She's beyond amazing, that's for sure. I'm working on getting a job, so everyone keep me in your thoughts and prayers! Also, my dad and I seem to be somewhat getting along - so this is definitely a plus!

On the contrary, I'm missing California like a bitch. I miss the weather, the people, and everything else there is to miss. It's so orgasmically amazing. So this weekend I had a dinner date with a friend with whom I've not seen in quite some time and was hoping to have a nice evening of "catching up" and other mindless gib-gab. Instead, we had a conversation (or "heated debate") about how Homosexuality is like alcoholism or a disease similar to this. Why must it be considered a disease, damn it? Is it not fucking possible that I simply am attracted to guys? Not addicted to or obsessed with - but truly attracted to and love men. Shit!

Needless to say, our evening was ruined and ended with us not talking as we finished our meals followed by each of us paying and going our separate ways. This may sound silly but after being told that I was diseased and that this person wasn't going to associate with a homosexual because it could make them look bad, I wasn't about to even attempt to salvage what was left of our night.

Oh, so I will say that it is nice to be in a location where I don't feel like I'm being judged with every passerby. It is a very freeing thing to know that I can be myself and comfortable with who I am. As a good friend and former teacher of mine put it "There are places, believe it or not, where people don't give a damn about who you are sleeping with!"

Nicely put, friend. Kudos to you!

Well, now to continue my random letters project (See Blog: Shake ya Tailfeathers)

Day 9:

Dear amazing cousin from Portland/Crescent City (Alexandra),

How the hell did I visit so many times and still have yet to meet you? Are the forces of the universe working against us, because damn it, I want to meet you. We have amazing conversation and I absolutely adore you but it is beyond time to hang out with you! I hope you work everything out with everything going on in your crazy world. You know I love you, cousin! Eh... hope to meet you? Haha. *awkward*

Love ya, ho!

Chris

Well, until next time...
Be kind to yourself and Others!

This above all: To thine own self be true

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Finally!

Well, I am officially living in Gainesville! I know I've neglected to blog as of late, but I've been beyond busy packing and moving! I promise that as soon as all is settles, I will be back to my witty, sarcastic ways!

Love you all!

Chris

Monday, July 26, 2010

The Journey's End

Greetings, friends!
I'm just posting a short update to let everyone know that I've officially made it back to Florida from the amazing Golden Coast/Wild Rivers Coast of California/Oregon! It was absolutely amazing and despite a few traveling delays and issues (which I will be sure to elaborate on tomorrow) all was well! I'm going to go attempt to sleep now - that shouldn't be too hard even with the jet lag and time zone differences!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Please, just lie to me!

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover. I'm a child, I'm a mother. I'm a sinner, I'm a saint. I do not feel ashamed. I'm your hell, I'm your dream. I'm nothing in between. You know you wouldn't want it any other way. - Meredith Brooks


Saturday, July 24, 2010

Waiting For That Day...

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. - Anais Nin


What a powerful quote this is in my life as of late. How painful and self-abusive is it to remain to tight in this bud (or closet) even when it started as a refuge. Just something to think about, for sure.

As my time here in California is coming to a bitter-sweet end, I am attempting to prepare myself mentally and emotionally for the rough journey ahead. Between moving, getting a job, and starting school there are so many changes taking place - all in a very difficult place in life. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I get ready for the trials and obstacles in the near future.

So today was a very nice day, indeed. I greatly enjoyed my last day out on the Smith River - it is so peaceful and enjoyable. I had a much needed conversation with a dear friend (much like a mother figure) today - thank you Roxanne. To put in words how much it means having someone to vent to and truly let out stress and emotions that have been shoved in such a fragile heart for quite some time is a difficult thing to attempt. Thank you for that, crazy lady. I can't wait to get some of your Hot Chocolate to take home!

Day 8:

Matthew,

Dearest internet friend - you're so freaking crazy! I love you to death, though I wish you'd figure yourself out. I enjoy being able to rant to you, though I wonder if you really ever read the rants that I type in mass quantities. I'm glad we've developed our friendship and I'm so glad you put up with my bullshit... but I put up with an equal amount from you. Thanks for everything, hun. Stay crazy, just not too crazy (I wonder at times, it's true!)

Love ya kid...

Chris

Well, my friends... until next time: Be kind to yourself and others!

This above all: to thine own self be true.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Ego-Boosting Bullcrap...

So on another social networking website of mine, I took a test to see exactly how literate I am concerning the most commonly confused and mixed-up words. Below are my results:

Your result for The Commonly Confused Words Test...

Advanced

You scored 100% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 93% Advanced, and 73% Expert!

You have an extremely good understanding of beginner, intermediate, and advanced level commonly confused English words, getting at least 75% of each of these three levels' questions correct. This is an exceptional score. Remember, these are commonly confused English words, which means most people don't use them properly. You got an extremely respectable score.


Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!



For the complete Answer Key, visit my blog: http://shortredhead78.blogspot.com/.



I was way too happy!

Let's Get Real for a Minute...

Okay, I know that my posts are usually light-hearted or satirical but I believe that it is time to get real. Tonight I watched a movie called "Prayers for Bobby" for the first time. If you've watched it, you could only imagine the mood that I'm in at the moment. Below this are the links to all parts of the movie in its entirety. I ask that, even if you've seen it, to watch it. Watch it and feel it, put yourself in the shoes of the young man, Bobby.

I shouldn't be so open online, but let me get a little more real:

There is more in common between Bobby and I than I like to ever talk about. Many times have I almost followed Bobby - don't think I've not contemplated suicide at some point in my past. All of my life I've been told that homosexuality is a disease, that it's an abomination, etc. How do you think that I could possibly feel as a person, as a Christian, about this news? On more occasions than one have I been so close to giving my life up simply because it is so much fucking easier to not even exist that it is to have to put up with the bullshit that is bigotry.

Even more recently, with everything coming to the surface, I've contemplated it again. No, it's not something I will do - so no need to run to a therapits. But this is real. The pain of knowing that my own family will more than likely reject me simply because I am gay is nearly unbearable. Countless nights have passed that I've spent hours crying, weeping even, hoping to change - to be healed... not even knowing that nothing was wrong. Thinking that something worse than homosexuality was wrong with me because I couldn't change! I've spent far too many days, weeks, months in depression thinking that I was damned. Please note how real this feeling is - you don't understand what I'm talking about, I am certain, becasue you have no fucking clue what it is like to be so different and so wrong and so hated...

I simply ask.. beg you to watch this movie. It is in 8 parts, all about 10 minutes or so on Youtube. It is worth your time - I promise. Watch it, embrace it. Cry as I have cried. Understand as much as possible what is feels like - and understand how close I have become (along with hundreds and thousands of others) to being a "Bobby".

Part 1 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=yfNvJ5NQe O0

Part 2 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=SuHyun2wC 94

Part 3 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=40AEPSXRN -M

Part 4 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=bKoNjGufU co

Part 5 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=gt8uuKd2x tk

Part 6 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=w5QgKWMqQ 3E

Part 7 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=VJ1AcNH81 vc

Part 8 of 8:
http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=FHjvrC2Gd ks

Thursday, July 22, 2010

You're A Loser Now...

*cries*

We Belong Together: Like Liz Taylor and Men

Sometimes I wonder why we subject ourselves to relationships and crushes that are seemingly unobtainable yet have some iota of hope - they are all so masochistic and inevitably end up leaving nothing but a heart shattered. At least this is the case for me; I always seem to allow my heart to fall for someone that, even though it seems that a relationship will blossom, is an unrealistic significant other.

Are there really leagues and if so, what league do I fall in? What is "out of my league" and what kind of guy falls into that category? Are all of the guys that I fall for qualify as such? These are the questions that wreak havoc in my mind on a daily basis.

Why do I love the idea of love so damn much? Why are we born with some predisposition for such a lethal emotion? Is it for everyone or just select "elite" group. Suppose it's not for the faint of heart? Oh well, one shouldn't dwell on such a depressing topic for long, so I'm going to move along.

Well, today was a great day! I met up with one of my long lost friends that I met several years ago, the last time I ventured to California. That was a nice reunion, indeed.

Day 7 (or 6... whatever)

Dear [insert ex-boyfriend's name here],

I miss you so much. I think about you often, as stupid as I was to fall in love with you. And to think that I actually shared something far too special to have wasted it on you. Fuck you. That's really about all I have to say. Maybe. I loved you and probably still do. I compare every guy I meet to you. You told me that you loved me yet you were in love with your other boyfriend, right? The one that you were fucking that night when you called me and you were shit-faced to tell me that it wouldn't work out becuase you were screwing him at that very moment. You even let him speak to me while you two were "in the act." You bitch. I hate you - yet I love you. Why? Why do I let myself love you. Probably because I've had about 9 Smifnoff Ices and two glasses of wine and I'm crying, singing Loretta Lynn (don't judge me, damn it!)

Anyway, I'm done wasting thoughts on you, bitch. Hope you have a nice life.

I loved you,

Chris

Till next time:

Be kind to yourself and others.

This above all: to thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

If Homosexuality Was A Disease...

If Homosexuality is a disease then let's call in "queer" to work: "Hello. Nope, can't work today. Still queer." - Robin Tyler

That's frustrates me - the epitome of southern mentality is that homosexuality is a disease. Are you freaking kidding me? So there is no way possible that I was born with some sort of predisposition, that a chemical imbalance or a lack of sufficient hormones couldn't have caused me to be attracted to men? Better yet, you don't think that I could have been made this way?

No. The dumbass, shallow-minded bigots like to assume that I'm disease-laden and that I must seek immediate help in order to turn from this shameful lifestyle. Don't you believe that I've tried to be "straight" - simply out of fear, not because I truly wanted to do so. I am happy with the person that I am and if you can't be happy with who I am, then I don't need you.

Another statement that sends me into an absolute rage is that I will contract AIDS simply because I am gay. Fuck you, mister shallow-minded bastard. AIDS is more common amongst middle age women at the present and I am not some sort of slut. Just because the stereotypical "gay scene" is some sort of fuckfest at a gay club, doesn't mean that I fall into that category. I still have my faith, my morals, and my standards (not implying that anyone else's standards are low/immoral) and I am safe. Yes, I've been tested to gain a sense of security. Yes, I've had sex... get over it. I was in a commited relationship for a decent amount of time and there was sexual intercorse. Both me and my partner submitted to an HIV/AIDS test to ensure to one another that we were safe and clean. Further protective measures were still made (aka: a condom was worn.)

I'm sure you could care less about all of this, but my point is that I'm not disease-ridden, I'm not going to die of aids simply because I'm gay, and I'm not some shameful person that deserves to be shunned from society simply because of my orientation.

Yes, I am gay... but I have a decent singing voice.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm a great photographer.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm very artistic.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm a fantastic writer.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm a wonderful friend.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm intelligent.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm successful and determined.
Yes, I am gay... but I'm still me; I am Chris.

Being gay isn't all of who I am. It's a small component that makes up "Chris." There are many other aspects of who I am and I don't want to be defined solely by my sexual orientation.

Don't introduce me as "Chris, your gay friend." Maybe introduce me as "Chris, your friend who wants to be a journalist."

Don't continue to point out that I'm gay. Trust me, I know that I'm gay.

When you look at me, look at me as "Chris." Nothing else should matter.

Okay, enough ranting for one afternoon. I just ask and pray that all of you please consider what I've had to say. This doesn't just apply to me, I assure you. Most gay guys would agree that being identified simply as "gay" is hurtful. Think about it before you do it. Please.

Be kind to yourself and others.

This above all: to thine own self be true.

The Grass is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank.

I believe that Erma Bombeck said it most accurately with that statement. Where there is the most shit in life you can find the most growth. Interesting. Stay tuned for my next post titled "If Homosexuality is a Disease..."

Moving on! So today I was listening to the most amazing comedian, Kathy Griffin (my dream celebrity fag-hag), and really enjoyed listening to her blast celebrities. I've been beyond frustrated lately and hearing someone talk shit about people who are always in the spotlight was nice - I was living vicariously through her. If you get the chance, do listen to Kathy (disclaimer: she is crude, rude, and foul. She's a keeper!) I've not laughed that hard in quite some time.

Oh, and I want this shirt so fu--king bad:



I love the older lady - she's hilarious! This is so true though, buy the shirt, contribute, share the video!

Oh, and my letter for today...

Day 6:

Dear Stranger,
Hi. Erm... this is awkard. How are you?
Oh, look! I have to go!
Bye!

-Chris

Okay, so I've not put much thought into blogging lately, but I've been very busy out here in California. Also, my wit and voice has been absent lately. Where the hell is Waldo? I know. No worries, friends. I will be back to normal shortly, I just have to have a moment to sit down and focus. Oh, I found some dirt on Glee (Season two) - and I have to rant to you about my new love for Big Brother, thanks to my friend Ty! Love ya kid!

Stay classy, stay sexy, and until next time...
Be kind to yourself and others!

This above all: to thine own self be true.

Just Kidding...

So I've gone three days without posting anything! As I sit here, Root Beer float in hand, (2:00am mind you) I'm thinking that I'm not going to post anything until tomorrow... aside from this random update. There are a few things that I'm excited to talk about with everyone and another project to work on along with my "Letters" project. We'll see how it goes. Oh, and I have a great story to tell from California. You just wait!

Till then, be kind to yourself and others.

Love you all!
Chris

Saturday, July 17, 2010

An refert, ubi et in qua arrigas?

*Snickers*

So on Thursday when I said that I would post my next update "tomorrow", I really meant "Saturday"... I'm a college student, I'm prone to procrastination - back off!

Is it just me or am I being hyper-punctual today? I'm not sure if that's even a word, but since I seem to be defunct tonight. I don't know what's wrong with me.

*awkward silence*

Damn, two in a row, I'm getting good with this whole "awkward moment" thing. So I suppose that it's time for me to come off of a confession or three, huh? You're all in luck because my confession today is:

Confession: I tend to take on projects and ideas and never complete them. This is a horrible habbit/flaw that I wish I didn't have. Damn it! I've sort of lost interest in this whole "flaw" thing, though, because I'm done throwing my pity party and I'm out of that slump of depression. So I hereby deem that project over. I don't need to sit here and pick apart my character for fortunes and flaws. It can be destructive, especially when I find more flaws than anything else. Maybe I'm just a bitch to myself, eh?

******

Day Three:

Dear Mom and Dad,

I'm gay.

******

Day Four:

Dear Leslie,

Thank you for being such an awesome sister. I miss you like crazy because you just had to move to NC as soon as you turned 18, but that's okay. I don't blame you, so I definitely forgive you! Thank you for being so supportive of me, I don't get that too often from family. You have two amazingly awesome kids and you are a great mother. I know that time are rough and that there is so much shit going on, but keep your head up, girl. The best is yet to come! I love you and the kids!

Bubba

******

Day Five:

Dear Dreams,

Why has it taken me so long to finally stop listening to the shallow minded idiots that tell me that you are unobtainable? Thankfully I have crazy friends like Sarah that tell me to go after my dreams and help me to realize that if I don't, I could be absolutely miserable! So, my dreams, stay there, I'm coming for you! Love you!


So I suppose that is the end of my boring, monotonous, mindless bullshit for today. One day, I promise, this will be something that you will be absolutely stoked (yes, stoked) to read! Maybe. Probably not. Epic fail.

Be kind to yourself and others.

This above all: To thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Friday, July 16, 2010

STFU!

Yes, my beloved followers, I'm aware that I have made several grammatical errors (and I few spelling errors as well). I'm tired, slightly tipsy, and in an "eff it" mood at the moment. Thanks, loves!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Dum spiro spero.

"While I breathe, I hope" - Cicero


Hell no, girlfriend! What the...

Okay, so i was beyond crushed when I saw special on the Discovery Channel about the birds that were always thought to be manogamous. For the longest time I've absolutely adored penguins (not so much the Dove, or other "monogamous" birds) and have always wanted to (jokingly - being the hopeless romantic that I am) ask a guy to be my "penguin". Stupid, I know, but don't hate.

Well, it seems as if these wonderfully faithful birds are doing their fair share of "getting busy." After doing several DNA tests, amongst other test, on several species of penguins, it has been found that "while daddy is away, momma likes to play." Several, if not most of the penguins did not belong to the "paternal penguin." This was absolutely devastating for me; it's like I've been lied to my entire life. What the hell, man. Seriously, people.

Interestingly enough, I also saw a special on the Tyra Show that mentioned that 1 in ever 10 people (roughly) have no idea who their biological father is. True, they are fairly certain that they know, even if it is the man you've called father all along. It has been proven that women are most likely to step outside of a marriage while "in heat" (for lack of a better primative phrase) and tends to have a more intense orgasm while having extra-marital sex. This increases the chances of conception. I find this disturbing, although in some strange way I'm not suprised. Don't be fooled, but women (and men alike) are just as sexual and animalistic (ish?) as the life around us.

*Awkard Silence*

Since I can find no suitable transition from something so distubring, I suppose simply moving on must do for now.

As for now, I must find comfort in my bed, beneath my covers, with my head restinng on a pillow. I know I've neglected to comply with the projects that I'm working on, but tomorrow I shall post my confession, fortune, and letter for both today and tomorrow. Be kind to yourself and others. Stay fabulous!

This above all: To thine own self be true.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Shake Ya Tailfeather...

Well this has been an interesting day to say the least. I'm sort of upset at the moment because my coloring skills aren't what I thought they were. I mean, when I color something it looks nice but I keep trying to blend colors and make things look realistic... maybe that's just not possible with a Disney Princess coloring book. I've also been trying to do a lot of writing lately and that just doesn't seem to be coming together like I'd hoped. Oh well. What can one do?

Anyways... moving on from that mindless banter; what's up with everyone lately? Is it just me or is everyone seemingly in some sort of mood lately? Everyone seems a little aggravated and slighly pissy. Or maybe it's just me - I'm so pissy and aggrivated that I'm projecting it onto everyone around me. I'm not sure. I also feel like I'm in the way. I'm at my aunt's for a few weeks in California and I just feel in the way. That's not a good feeling. No, it's not.

Confesion: I put myself down all the time. I always try to find something wrong with myself - kind of like this whole project that I'm doing. How crazy is it? Well... if you really knew me you would know that I actually think a lot more of myself than I let on to believe. I just fear that everyone else disagrees with me so when I'm around people I put myself down that way anything that they say wouldn't come as a disappointment or bring me down... which only brings me down more. I'm pretty twisted, I know. Thanks for pointing that out.

Fortune: I have strikingly beautiful eyes. I love them; they are absolutely amazing. They vary in color however, from a slate grey to a crystal-like blue. They're one of a kind and they're mine!

Oh! I'm cutting the whole project about writing something about one person each day... instead I'm taking on this new project that I found. I'm using my message to Sarah yesterday to compensate for "Day 1" - because she's the bff - and I will move on to "Day 2".

EACH DAY, WRITE A LETTER TO THESE PEOPLE :

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror




Day 2 — Your Crush:

Dear "he who must not be named"...
I'm not quite sure where to begin, really. Do you even know I exist? I mean, I'm aware you know I exist because we talk with some regularity, but do I exist as more than a contact in your phone that you respond to out of some sort of obligation? I doubt it. I like you so much and you are so freaking adorable... but I'm sure nothing will ever materialize. So, sexy man, this is for you.

Signed,
Mister Chris™

This above all: To thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

If you really knew me...

This whole project is seemingly becoming more difficult with each day. Am i discovering truths about myself that I had neglected to see or attempted to hide beneath a bubbly facade? What the hell, this was supposed to be fun and self-discovering... but I suppose in some masochistic way it really is. This definitely allows me to deconstruct my personality/character and provides a foundation on which to rebuild.

Oh, damn! New idea: each day of this project, I will provde one flaw and one fortune about all that is "Chris" that way I can oust the bad and bring forth the things about me that I truly like. This might help combat the whole "depression" thing and would allow me to really analyze my character and become a better person... or something?!?

Hey, I'm just some sort of genius today. I think that I will also pick a person each day that I know and will comment on one thing that I admire about them. Awesome idea, I know. Thanks, I thought so too! Who knows, maybe all of this crap will start some crazy revolution where people go around analyzing themselves and getting to know who they truly are before they go around criticizing someone else's character flaws. It may not supress world hunger or find a cure for diseases like cancer or AIDS, but it's some start, right? C'mon, at least give me brownie points or something.

With no further ado, I introduce to you "Confession #3"...

Confession #3: If you really knew me, you would know that I'm not the best at keeping secrets. If you have something to confide in me and it is seriously "reputation-ruining" or truly something important and personal, then it is something that will never leave me. But for some reason whenever I am told something that no one else knows, I am compelled to tell them so that I feel like some sort of "know-it-all"... Sick, I know. This is something that I've been struggling with for a long time and I'm finally getting my tongue under control. Thankfully I've not seriously injured friendships with this flaw, but I know that I have definitely caused a few speed bumps along the way. No one wants to be friends with someone who has loose lips, and I am so thankful that I have amazing friends that I know I can confide in if need be.

Fortune #1: Without being conceited, I will say that I truly like that I am mature for my age. I know how to be extremely mature but I'm not totally lame. I know when I can have fun and "let loose", but I also know how to snap out of it. There have been times when people have assumed that I was much older than I actually am simply because of my level of maturity. Laugh if you want, it's the truth.

Person of the day: Sarah L. Green, where to start, hun? This girl is great, not only that but she's Green! You can't get any more amazing than that, I must say! Honestly, though, she's put up with the most shit from me. From 9th grade until now we have gone through so many different roller coaster and I truly admire her willingness to forgive me every time I've done something worthy of being catapulted from the fortress of "Sarah". She doesn't allow people back in often, so when she does it's something that should be cherished forever. I love you, Sarah! You're the bestest.

Well, I guess that concludes my ramblings for now. I'm sure I'll hear something hilarious or find something noteworthy on E! later tonight.

This above all: To thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Monday, July 12, 2010

Google Me, Please!

Is it just me or does Google's in-the-works social networking site cause your mind to make scum angels in the gutter that is "sexual innuendo"? "Google Me" is going to be the next big rival in the social networking realm. Oh, goody. Something else to occupy hours upon hours of our day. Why are we so devoured by technology and sites like Facebook? Oh, speaking of facebook, Google will be taking the makers of the Zynga games (Farmtown, Farmville, Mafia Wars, etc) with them. They will no longer be on Facebook but on this new "booty call", Google Me. Oh, damn.

So you mean I'll have to copy and paste all of my information and shit from one site to another? Why. Why must we always convert to the newest thing out there? I've yet to convert to Blue Ray, I'm slowly converting to my iPod from CD's... I'll be damned if I'm going to convert to Google Me. Geez, people. Now, I'm sure that I'll find some reason to open an account, so don't mark my words.

Well in other news, the Octopus that predicted the outcome of 8 matches during the world cup decided to retire today. There's a shocker.

Until tomorrow - be kind to yourself and others.

Confessions: Pt. 2

Damn. I can already sense that this little project will be a difficult one for me because I will be allowing everyone to know the things that I don't even like to think are qualities that I posess.

Confession #2: I'm far too emotional. Yes, I'm emo - just not in the stereotypical "gothic/screamo/doom&gloom" sense of the word. I can go from "sweet to bitch" in a matter of seconds. I am beyond sensitive and I tend to get a little pissy and hang on to every last word that someone says which is totally destructive becuase, although a person's intentions weren't to offend or hurt, I will find a way to make it do so. Maybe I'm bi-polar? Who knows, but this is definitely a huge flaw of mine and though I don't like to admit it, it is what drives a lot of people away from me. No one wants to be around a pathetic, whinning bitch all the time.

Heh. Maybe this whole "dissecting the soul of Chris" thing isn't the best idea. We shall see! More to come, I assure you.

This above all else: To thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Sunday, July 11, 2010

These Are My Confessions...

I think that I've schemed some new idea of a daily blog. Every day I will delve into my soul and uncover one truth (or confession) about my life, my personality, and possibly reveal the "Chris" that I seem to attempt to hide from the world.

Confession #1: I am an attention whore. I tend to do whatever possible to obtain attention, whether it is obtained from being loud and in the center of attention or by being the "drama queen" and standoff-ish. From using an elaborate and sophisticated vocabulary or acting a total ass, I enjoy attention.

Am I proud of this? Not at all. Anything that may make me seem like a bitch is not something that I would ever be proud of and is something that I will work on changing.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Defy Gravity!

I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so! Some things I cannot change, but 'till I try I'll never know! Oh how true these lyrics from Wicked's "Defying Gravity" are in my life. We can't let someone else's limitations and goals define our own. That has been on my mind so much lately as I've decided to follow my dreams and go after a degree in journalism; a career that is risky and challenging,but dreams are meant to be big so that you can grow into them. I've always felt like everyone had put limitations on my ability and I know that I have the potential to become the absolute best at anything that I attempt.

You know what I need to do? I need to write more because my voice is lacking. I've noticed that over the last three or four days. I don't see my narative vocie, my overall snarky and sarcastic attitude in anything that I've been writing. This is a problem, damn it.

I'll be back!

This above all else: to thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare

Thursday, July 8, 2010

According to You...

I've yet to understand why someone would subject themself to an abusive relationship whenever it's obviously mentally and emotionally unhealthy. Eh, things I shall never comprehend, I suppose.

Okay, moving on from my rant this evening, I've decided that it would be a good idea to use my blog to begin some sort of foundation in journalism - being my field of study and all. I'm thinking news/entertainment, design/fashion, and criticism (movies, plays, books, etc.) would be a great foundational basis on which I can begin some form of journalism. We shall see how it all comes together.

In other news, there was an earthquake in California yesterday however I was not anywhere near the epicenter and felt no sort of shock wave from the quake. No worries, my loves, all is well here in Crescent City. Off to cook dinner and to scale to Vista Pointe to watch the sun set over the Pacific! Love you all!

This above all else: To Thine Own Self Be True.
- Shakespeare

California Boys: They're Unforgettable!

As much as Katy Perry fancies singing about "California Girls" while she runs through her twisted fantasy of Candy Land (ft. Snoop Dogg), I've found a much more appealing source of eye-candy on the west coast. Granted, I'm too far north for the "surfer boy" look (save Austin, the cashier in SafeWay), it seems as if there is a whole new gene pool out here. I've always been surrounded by the "small town" shallow (and much imbred) gene pool that is Starke, Florida. I will admit that it is nice not seeing every guy in a huge truck, jacked up with tires the size of my VW Passat and some sort of racist, sexist, or southern saying on the rear window.

Oi Vey! Enough of mindless ranting, I suppose. I've officialy decided on a major - I'm finally following my dreams! I will major in Journalism (possibly double major in English) with a double minor in Education and Communication. I do believe that this will encompass all of my passions and will provide for a "fall-back" career option (teaching) that I will love just as much as journalism. Now for the tough decision: do I chose Photojournalism (passion), Design/Fashion Journalism (passion), or Entertainment/News Journalism (passion)? All three are very dear to me and I'm just not sure which I would do. I suppose that Fashion/Design would give way to Entertainment/News Journalism, what with red carpet events and all. And who says that I can't incorporate photography and photojournalism into all of this?

Well, I'm off to scale the Redwood Nat'l Forest or to walk along the harbor and watch the California Sea Lions bark their way into oblivion again. Perhaps I'll have something more interesting to rant and rave about later.

This above all else: To thine own self be true.
-Shakespeare