Monday, August 23, 2010

I am a "dork fish"...

Well hello, stranger. Come here often?

Ah, the life of a college student. The hustle and bustle of frantic freshmen attempting to find a parking spot, knowing nothing of the "overflow" parking that is truly much easier to park in (rather than dealing with all of the bull-shit of the other parking-lots around campus); the "back-to-school" hang-overs from the mad parties around the 'Ville last night. It's a life you grow to love, that's for certain.

I must say that I love my classes (the two that I attended today) so far. My Art History class is going to kick my ass, I know, but I love Professor Lambert; she is one hell of a lady, and her idiosyncratic ways of teaching make it all the better. Surprisingly, I really enjoy my algebra class - as much as I do not appreciate the subject. Prof. Trefry seems slightly ditsy, though I'm hoping it was just because of the confusion that is expected with the first day. Once class began, she didn't seem so disheveled.

Oh, so my random "ear-gasm" for today comes from Ludo, and here it is for your viewing pleasure:

Well, I'm off to work on my math homework for a while. Till next time, be kind to yourself and others!

This above all: to thine own self be true.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.

"I'm more of a man than you'll ever be, and more of a women than you'll ever get." -Rent

So I've spent the majority of my day jamming out to this song by Beyonce. The reason why is still unknown to me but I freaking love it! Sorry - random, I know. I will be blogging more soon because there is so much more I have to update you on! My life is changing like crazy with every passing day!

Love you all! Keep checking in with me!


Sunday, August 8, 2010

Always Reaching for that Rising Star...

By Chris Davis
December 2009

I walk along betwixt the trees
The moonlight shinning down
Through the branches
Through the thickets
Casting shadows all around
Shadows that haunt
Shadows that follow
Shadows that call my name
This must be someone’s sick and twisted
“Schadenfreude” type game
They call at me and remind me
Remind me of the things of old
And those that will never be
They taunt me
They tease me
And tell me of what could
What should
And what shouldn’t
And what shouldn’t... is me

I believe in...

I believe in…

I believe in art.

I believe in love.

I believe in kissing.

I believe in miracles.

I believe that tomorrow is another day.

I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner.

I believe that if you want your life to be a magnificent story that you begin by realizing that you are the author and not the publisher. You have the right to make choices and live your life how you wish, but ultimately you are not the finisher of your story. Everyday you have the opportunity to write a new page, clean and blemish free to strive for your absolute potential.

I believe that some people aren’t meant to be in our lives forever. Maybe, just maybe, these people around us are simply passing through, bringing us something that we could not otherwise obtain: a gift, a blessing, or maybe just a lesson that we needed to learn. Some come and stay for a season, but even the short-lived can make the longest-lasting impressions.

I believe that you can’t live to please, and you sure can’t be perfect. You can’t let words define your love, you can’t allow what someone says hold you back from your life and from your love; you have to know that you have a purpose, you have worth, and you are a creation like no other ever created.

Dearest, darlingest Mumsie and Popsicle...

Consider this my disclaimer: I will not be held responsible for any medical attention necessary (this includes counseling and psychotherapy) to remove the potentially mind-imploding mental images that this may cause to occur.

Around the country there are old, horny, erectile-dysfunction laden teachers pissed about the latest change in their healthcare policies which no longer cover the “wonder pill”, Viagra, because it is not a pill that is needed to essentially “sustain life” and is considered a “pleasure medication”.

Are you freaking kidding me? No, this doesn’t add to the “creeper-pedophilic” stereotype given to old, creepy teachers at all! C’mon, healthcare companies, these poor teachers are pissed because of you! It’s not their fault that they can’t hold an erection long enough to bust a nut in bed! Oh shit, this is priceless.

Oh, congratulations California for the overturning of Proposition 8 – which removed the right of homosexual couples to marry in the state of California! I’m sure this won’t stand for long before it is re-established, but this is definitely a step in the right direction! I know that one day I will want to marry the love of my life even if that is a man. Sure, marriage sure as hell isn’t the sacred act and display of love that it used to be, but it would be nice to know that I could if I wanted to do so. Maybe the actions in California will lead to some revolution and revelation nation-wide and a respectable right will be given to the homosexual community. Of course, the typical gay “scene” totally negates anything that may be appealing about the homosexual community (to “breeders”, a.k.a. heterosexuals) and ruins any chances of a widespread acceptance – not to mention the shallow-minded bigots that think that they are without fault.

Almost forgot: Spring Awakening is coming to Gainesville! I am so freaking excited! It’s going to be amazing – and I’m so pissed that I forgot about the Producers (what with my trip to California and all) and missed it! What’s up with that? Ugh! I’ve seen the Gene Wilder version of the movie “The Producers” and loved it, but would absolutely die at the chance to be able to see it via live performance.

In other news, Step Up 3 3D was phenomenal. An orgasm for all of the senses – the rhythm, dancing, and not to mention the shirtless men – it was by far the best of the three. I would recommend seeing this movie even if you don’t see it in 3D, it is well worth the time and money.

Day 10:

Dear Chad,

Oh, where to begin? The seemingly most cliché place would be at the beginning I suppose, so why not?

Well, whenever I first found out that we were on the same “team” I was more than excited even though I was still locked away safely in the comfort of my closet – it was comforting and exciting to know that I had a cousin – family – that I could relate to and potentially be able to discuss things with and talk to about so many different feelings and thoughts that were wreaking havoc on my poor mind.

Eventually I slowly began bursting from the confines of said closet and emerging into a world of bigotry, prejudice, and uncertainty – confusion. Sure, I had friends to lean on, though a limited few could I trust to support me and help keep the closet door only partially open! Finally came the time to reveal this long kept secret, although Facebook wasn’t the most tactful way of doing so, I still was able to tell you that I too was gay – hoping that this would form some sort of relationship that had before never existed. I wanted to be able to talk to you and get to know you (and your adorable boyfriend) more and hopefully have someone that I could trust, etc. Not that I don’t trust amazing friends like Sarah or Megan – but it would be nice to have family to talk to – although I have the incredible Jane to talk to… I love her like crazy!

Thanks for everything, I suppose.


Well, that's all for tonight, folks.

Be kind to yourself and others.
This above all: To thine own self be true.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

A chair is still a chair...

Laughter (n): When a smile has an orgasm

*Le Sigh*

Why do I love the idea of "love" so fucking much? Why do I insist on thinking that I will find true love at such an early age in life, neglecting to really enjoy my youth? It's very abusive to ones mind and soul - and doesn't really allow for one to enjoy much. It creates a false sense of ineptness (if that's a word) and insufficiency - not a great feeling, especially when one suffers with low self-esteem already! Damn it. Why do I want "love" - why now? I don't need it now and thus shouldn't want it now, but damn it, I couldn't want it more! Why? Because for some short period of time I had it - but that was ripped away from me - stupid bitch. But I'm definitely not getting into that conversation any time soon.

Well - today was good none the less. I got to hang out with my bestie, Sarah! She's the greatest. Geez, I love her. If I were straight... hell, shouldn't even go there because that's not happening any time soon (ever!) Now I'm just chilling with the roomie, Megan, at Starbucks and drinking a Passion Tea Lemonade. I love her too, Megan, she's amazing!

I'm not going to write a letter at the moment because I'm still working on it - it's a tough one for me to write and get's a little personal. So until next time, friends, be kind to yourself and others.

This above all: to thine own self be true!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Never Underestimate...

Never underestimate the pain of a person because the truth is that everyone is struggling. Some people hide it better than others.

So, I'm back and officially living the the G-ville. (Gainesville, for all of you non-Floridians or non-locals that don't know what "G-ville" refers to.)

I couldn't love it more here. I have an amazing room mate (Megan) whom I love dearly. She's beyond amazing, that's for sure. I'm working on getting a job, so everyone keep me in your thoughts and prayers! Also, my dad and I seem to be somewhat getting along - so this is definitely a plus!

On the contrary, I'm missing California like a bitch. I miss the weather, the people, and everything else there is to miss. It's so orgasmically amazing. So this weekend I had a dinner date with a friend with whom I've not seen in quite some time and was hoping to have a nice evening of "catching up" and other mindless gib-gab. Instead, we had a conversation (or "heated debate") about how Homosexuality is like alcoholism or a disease similar to this. Why must it be considered a disease, damn it? Is it not fucking possible that I simply am attracted to guys? Not addicted to or obsessed with - but truly attracted to and love men. Shit!

Needless to say, our evening was ruined and ended with us not talking as we finished our meals followed by each of us paying and going our separate ways. This may sound silly but after being told that I was diseased and that this person wasn't going to associate with a homosexual because it could make them look bad, I wasn't about to even attempt to salvage what was left of our night.

Oh, so I will say that it is nice to be in a location where I don't feel like I'm being judged with every passerby. It is a very freeing thing to know that I can be myself and comfortable with who I am. As a good friend and former teacher of mine put it "There are places, believe it or not, where people don't give a damn about who you are sleeping with!"

Nicely put, friend. Kudos to you!

Well, now to continue my random letters project (See Blog: Shake ya Tailfeathers)

Day 9:

Dear amazing cousin from Portland/Crescent City (Alexandra),

How the hell did I visit so many times and still have yet to meet you? Are the forces of the universe working against us, because damn it, I want to meet you. We have amazing conversation and I absolutely adore you but it is beyond time to hang out with you! I hope you work everything out with everything going on in your crazy world. You know I love you, cousin! Eh... hope to meet you? Haha. *awkward*

Love ya, ho!


Well, until next time...
Be kind to yourself and Others!

This above all: To thine own self be true